I’ve been following a very interesting discussion on one of the many unschooling lists in regards to unschooling being anarchy. And an interesting discussion about the common misconception that unschooling means “unparenting”. I thought I’d touch on it a little bit since I’ve had this swirling around in my head for a little bit. Unschooling isn’t easy. And it’s not the lazy way out. At least not in our house. It would be much MUCH easier to buy a curriculum, sit my kids down, and “do school”. Ok, so it would technically be easier; it’d be damn hard to force them to do their work when they’re interested in 213,872,476,474 other things. So I guess, in that one regard, it’s easier, since we’re not forcing kids to do work against their will. But, it’s work and takes a lot of thought to be an unschooling parent.
First off, we have 4 totally different kids. And, just because Sophia isn’t “school age”, doesn’t mean she’s not drinking up her surroundings. Even the kids that share similar learning styles, don’t like the same things or are interested in the same things. There are some common likes: certain video games (but not all), riding bikes, play at the park, the lake, swimming, building weird contraptions, art, experimenting with all sorts of things. But even with those common likes, there’s a lot that they don’t all agree on.
We strive to make their lives large and swirly. That doesn’t mean plunking a year’s salary on something (though, if it was a long held interest and a passion, we’d go out of our way to try to make it happen somehow), but to take what we have and make their lives huge. Which takes work. Four kids, four different styles of processing their worlds, four different sets of interests. And we, as their parents, have to stay on top of what they like, are interested in, help them link up their likes with activities and so on.
Then there’s modeling principles and morals. There’s keeping in mind how to be a mindful parent. How to help them explore their world safely, within the natural and social and safety limits, while not smothering their interests. There’s answering the 300,000,000 questions you don’t know the answers too, but you’ll look them up and help answer them, learning new, neat stuff in the process yourself. It’s more than just not doing school. In the absense of school, there’s life. And life is busy and crazy and sad and happy and boring and BIG!
Now I’m not saying it’s horrible work, or a sacrifice, but it does take effort and thought. But, the rewards are so great, and so tremendous. Happy, healthy, loving, content, playful kids. Kids who are free and able to explore all their various likes and dislikes with supportive parents. Well worth the work IMHO.
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