Cake For Breakfast

I’m beginning to think more and more that each generation gets smarter than the last. Or, I’m just getting older and my brain is aging??? But, sometimes it seems like that, since I swear, my kids are out-thinking me at a faster and faster rate! They’re like these little sponges soaking up all this knowledge and then they squeeze it out on me and I’m stunned. Not that it surprises me; all four kids have a real thirst for knowledge, but every so often it comes in a big wave and leaves me stranded on shore so to speak Lately we’ve been having conversations about the USSR and the KGB and history, and the stuff they’ve picked up and read about just because they’re interested in it from something else totally unrelated that had a mention about the Cold War in it, is so neat to discover.

I’ve also found that it’s a good thing our library doesn’t make us stick to the “2 non-fiction per family per topic” rule lately. Every time we go to the library, it seems like we’re bringing home 20+ books a kid. Another reason the 50 book limit is so great. Last trip it was 22 for me, 17 for Azura and the boys didn’t go but we brought some home for them. That doesn’t include the ones she still had checked out. And that WITH boys who aren’t big fans of reading for pleasure!!!

What kills me is the memory they have on them too. Stuff we talked about eons ago they seem to remember at the weirdest times but at times that actually fit into what they’re remembering. I sure as hell don’t have a memory like that!! Smarty Pants….

I guess not so much we, as one of the kids. Sophia’s been not feeling hot all month, and ended up really sick last week. It’s the first time she’s been “sick-sick” ever, so it really took a lot out of her. Even through the flu in March, she was still active and moving and bouncing around, and she recovered in 2 days where it took the rest of us (other than Max) a week to recover. So this really kicked her legs out from under her. But, she recovered in time for her fourth birthday party And she had a blast.

I’m finding it hard to believe my little baby is FOUR already Half the time she seems so old, and the other half of the time she seems so little. But, she’s four now Wow.

Hopefully October was her bumpy month. And, as it’s over tonight, I’d say it wasn’t all that bad. At least she’ healthy and ready to go trick or treating tonight as a horse-pegasus-unicorn thingy…and, like always, the other three kids are going to be various shades of scary creatures.

This thought came to me today when I was busy with other things,and just after I read a page in Rue’s book about reading and one-size not fitting all, and I personally think it’s a fitting analogy. Kids are like flowers. Flowers are ALL flowers, but they’re also all unique. What works for a rose could kill an orchid. What would work for an orchid might kill a sunflower. Though they’re all flowers (just like children are all children, but all unique) they need individual care and attention. You can’t treat all flowers the same, only a few would survive. Orchids need delicate specific care, roses need different care, carnations need yet another different kind of care, wildflowers need even more different care and attention. All flowers don’t sprout from a seed at exactly the same time, and all flowers do not grow at exact same intervals and all flowers do not grow all to the exact same height. Even within the same family of flowers you have flowers that bloom early and flowers that bloom later and some that bloom exactly when the back of the seed pack said they’d bloom. Some grow big and tall, some grow short and wavy, some grow within the average range. We don’t force flowers to grow or to make roses into orchids or to pull small flowers taller or to push down tall ones. We don’t make flowers uniform and identical. We relish and wallow in the beauty of the individual flower, with all its uniqueness and specialness and welcome the differences.

Kids are just like that, yet we force them into things before they’re ready and do not trust that they’ll learn to do things when they’re fully ready. We trust flowers will grow and reach for the sky and be the exact flower they’re supposed to be, yet we don’t trust the same of our children. We push and pull and try to mold them from orchids and roses and wildflowers and bluebells to be mass produced, factory-farmed, all of one type. Someone years ago preferred nice cultured rows of one flower and now they have places all over mass producing (or attempting to) these little cultured flowers. But they don’t smell as sweet or look as nice or look as happy as flowers left to grow in peace. Just like children.

Children are as unique as the flowers and should be treated as such. There’s no one-size-fits-all when it comes to gardening, and there isn’t a one-size-fits-all for kids.

Take time to smell the roses or bluebells or sunflowers, with your very unique, loved, honoured and cherished for exactly who they are, children, and listen to the lessons nature has to offer us. We are, as you know, part of nature. Just like the roses and the orchids and the wildflowers will sprout and grow and bloom and flourish with good guidance and a helping hand, so will children.

To celebrate post 100, I wanted to focus on something joyful, and what could be more joyful than fall leaf piles

I give you….leaf fun!! To see the larger picture, click the thumbnails

And a scrap page I did of Sophia:

I didn’t want to accept this as a comment, because I feel it’s not the proper forum, but I thought it DID need addressing especially as it came from a visitor from the Unschooling Carnival.

This is the comment and it was made about the post “Unschooling Support”:

In the province of NB, all children have to registered with the province when they are of school age. Pubilc school has the fall registration, but private school children and ‘homeschooled’ children all MUST get an exemption from public school education. It seems that you have not done that. If you think you are doing such a great job, why haven’t you done that for your children? And it is the law in NB, if the superintendent of education finds out you haven’t filed for an exemption, you could be in big trouble. Just thought you should know.

I’d like to thank my mysterious commentator, who didn’t leave a name, for caring enough about my kids to comment on something they know nothing about. Not that it’s any one’s business but our own either. We are fully aware of the law and policies and requirements for homeschooling in our province. Not just in our province, but in all provinces in Canada. I keep up with the legal homeschooling news and any new policies and politics that affect homeschoolers in our province and in Canada. So, I’m well aware of my legal and otherwise responsibilities for my children’s education in our province. And threatening me ever so nicely that I might possibly be in big trouble isn’t very constructive when you don’t know what you’re talking about. If there’s some concern, then please put a name to a post and we can discuss your concerns. I am not required to inform the Internet of our exemption status or get approval from anyone other than those that need to give approval.

I realize that I’ve opened myself up to comments like this having an open blog that people can access, and by writing posts for a wider audience. So I do accept that this could and would eventually happen. But that doesn’t mean it’s a free for all to make veiled threats or suppositions.

I put this comment out here, so maybe the person who wrote it would like to have a discourse on why it is they think and feel and KNOW so vehemently that we’re not in compliance? Would someone like to point me to the undeniable proof that we’re non-compliant and “in big trouble”?

And does anyone else see the dark humour of this comment coming on a post about Unschooling Support? Very interesting…

But, this is even more reason I stand by my post about homeschooling and unschooling support. This is a perfect example. Because of all the support groups and information and discussion online, I KNOW what my legal rights and responsibilities are, and I know exactly when and where I need to comply and how to go about it. And we do, because of all the online information.

So if my unknown person would like to comment on this post, please feel free. Otherwise maybe it would be wise to concern yourself elsewhere.

For the November Unschooling Voices Carnival:

On the topic of support in unschooling…how much do you have from family & friends? Are there other unschoolers near you or do you belong to an offline unschooling group? How important is having that support?

In our day to day lives we don’t have any unschooling support to speak of. There are no unschoolers in our area, no support groups. There are various homeschooling groups, but we haven’t fit in too well there. Government statistics estimate that there are only 100 families who homeschool in our entire province, and adding in those that might not have been counted for one reason or another, say 200 families. There is one other unschooling family in the province I know of, in fact, it’s Ron and Andrea from atypicalhomeschool.net but in our city, there’s no one that I’ve found.

We’re really firm in our belief about unschooling though, so we don’t need a support group or IRL unschoolers to keep us on track. It would be nice from time to time to talk to like-minded people in person, but with the wonderous expanse of the internet, it’s not needed as much.

When it comes to friend and family support, our mileage varies It varies from adament against what we’re doing, to full on support and acceptance. Most people fall between those two extremes though. And, for the majority of our family and friends we don’t use the term “unschooling” but instead use the term homeschooling. We do explain the method we use to people that are interested, but we don’t use the label “unschooling” around people that don’t understand it. Most people at the very least accept the fact we homeschool, whether they like it or not, but for full on support we have one or two family/friends who fully support what and how we’re doing.

I would have to say, after 4 1/2 years of unschooling, more support would be nice from family and friends. Acceptance is nice, but support would be more useful. I don’t think that support groups would give that “family” needed support though I must say, having online support and references have been a help to answer questions and concerns and worries people have had. But it’s not the same as having family and friends who support us fully. So at times that’s a downside.

The friends that support us the most and have never, in all these years said anything negative about homeschooling or how we homeschool, are, ironically a couple who consist of a university professor and a teacher They’ve never said a word against what we do, which I appreciate and am very thankful for even if our education views differ. Our parenting views however are almost exactly the same, and I think because of that, they get that education is personal to each person and that what works for one person may not work for the next person. It’s been a huge help over the years to have a family that’s close to us and the kids who never mention homeschooling or schooling or education and instead focuses on the friendship. It’s nice.

On the family front, it’s divided in three camps. One camp accepts the homeschooling but isn’t always happy about that choice. One camp doesn’t care how the kids are educated, as long as they’re happy and stable and developing well. One camp both accepts and supports homeschooling as the right choice. None of our families have been adamentally against homeschooling but there has been conflict and misunderstandings at times over the years and people seem to flow between camps over time. Some of the people sometimes fall into the undying support camp and move to the not happy camp, some stick in the middle camp. It seems really dynamic to me.

For us, best case scenario to me, would be to have full family and friend support, and continue having online support. For us, having an offline support group would be third on the list It would be family/friend, then online, then offline. Mostly because even within an offline group, there would be conflict. It’s easier to sort it out when it’s online.

For unschoolers just starting out, the online groups (be it discussion groups or support groups) is a godsend. Especially those that have tried other methods before coming to unschooling. We started out unschooling, so we didn’t have the same hurdles that others might have, though we’ve shared common concerns at times that every unschooling must face at some point. For new unschoolers though, I think a huge help is, though it seems like a very harsh thing at times, the online discussion groups. Places like Unschooling Discussion and Always Learning seem to spark thought. They sort of push that envelope of thought more and more until you walk away shaking your head thinking they’re all crazy and mean, but you can’t get the thoughts and words and discussions and points out of your head and the more you think about it all, the more sense it makes and the easier and clearer it is to understand and you re-join the group and keep reading and asking questions and looking inside yourself and BOOM! There it is. I think the discussion groups are as important to all unschoolers as support groups are. They are inherently different, but both are valuable assets.

One other new and interesting form of support for those that don’t have offline support, are all the blogs and ezines and articles and personal stories that are online now. Blogs/journals are a wonderful way for families to share their daily lives and for the readers to see unschooling in action. On those days where you think all unschoolers are superfamilies who have their acts together 24/7 you can read about moms who are having the same day you are, or families who have experienced something new and unique. They are a fount of information for ideas, support, thought, and support. I don’t think they can be dismissed too lightly. And I’m not just saying that because I have one…really

No matter what support you have at your finger tips, there’s always things to be learned and people to ask and things to explore. Having offline support covers some of those bases, but having online support is as important IMHO. And, it makes it a lot easier if you have family support, but even if you don’t, there are lots of places now to find that support.

And I can hear my mother’s shriek from here I found a second-hand Singer sewing machine for $35 and couldn’t resist the price. Just to mend stuff it was worth it. So we brought it home. Good lord it’s a workhorse. It’s easily as old as I am, one of those monster, solid metal ones, and purrs like a kitten. And, all my mother’s lessons were NOT in vain, though she may have thought that over the years, because within 15 minutes of having it open, I had bobbins filled, and threaded and up and running and mending things, even though I haven’t touched a sewing maching in easily 15 years. Items that have sat in a “take and get fixed” pile for years were pulled out and mended. Within 15 more minutes, I had literally fixed every item of clothing that had needed a seam or a hem or a hole fixed and was, to I’m sure my mother’s eternal delight, looking for something more to do

So see Mom? Sometimes it takes 15 years….

I’m going to try some easy peasant dresses or skirts and some Halloween costumes and I figure pillows for the couch can’t be too hard…and, you never know, the kids might have a talent for sewing I don’t/didn’t….they’re way more creative in an artsy way than I am